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TheColossal

Embarrassed by Xwing?

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I'm straight forward with people that I love Star Wars and it always seems to surprise them. (I have a mandalorian skull sticker on my tool cart at work!) I guess I don't look "nerdy" since I have a shaved head and tattoo sleeves, piercings etc. Maybe that's why people are surprised? Looks don't dictate interests tho, either way I'm into star wars and I don't care who knows, I collected Decipher Star Wars CCG cards when I was younger right up until their licensed was pulled. Currently I play star wars galaxy of heroes on my phone, I participate in the Topps Star Wars card trader app as well as collecting physical Star Wars Topps cards, I have two sideshow collectibles 1/6 figures and one hot toys 1/6 figure and of course almost every X-Wing Miniatures ship which I play as often as I can and when Star Wars Battlefront 2 comes out I will be all over that!

 

My advice, own it. If you really love it and someone is going to look down on you for your hobby (whatever it may be) do you really want to associate with that person. I'm not talking about people who are generally not interested but those who actually would put you down because of it.

On women, My GF doesn't care in fact she likes Star Wars too (not as much as me) but hey w/e a mild like is better than no interest at all.

Be proud of what you're into!

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Ahhhh, this topic. The people who matter won't care, the people who care won't matter. 

 

I will say though that I bought into this game on a Tuesday, and by Friday my gf was my ex gf (this was a year and a half ago). Not saying it was definitely a cause, but she definitely didn't like the idea of the game lol. 

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10 hours ago, TheColossal said:

Hi all,

First time posting on these forums, created this account so I could get your thoughts and experiences. I've been playing since Wave 6. I'm a competitive player and have had plenty of success in lots of tourneys. If you play on vassal, you've definitely seen me :)

 

Last weekend, I won an event at my FLGS. I was absolutely delighted and on such a high for a couple of days as a result. On Monday, when people at work asked what I did for the weekend, I felt too embarrassed to tell them about my victory. I'm very passionate about Xwing, and spend so much time playing, theory crafting, listening to podcasts etc., but I keep that stuff totally separate from my day-to-day. 

 

I know the short and simple answer is to be proud of my hobby; if people can't handle it, screw them. Really, I'm just wondering if anyone else has a similar experience? I'd love to know how all of you manage your Xwing life with your outside life.

 

For example, on one podcast, they discussed when you should tell a girl you are dating that you play! This has genuinely been a problem for me as well  :D

 

Thanks,

Colossal

I work at a very large company that handles 1,000,000,000 plus worth of investments and can say without question I have a Tie Fighter hanging out along with my Dir Ker Pop. You just have to be one with the force :-p

Honestly the older I get the more I don't have the energy to care what other people think about my hobbies, in fact more people are starting to like Star Wars because its trendy and board games are in a golden age. Be encourage.

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The company I work for has a pretty large inner-office gaming community - I've played x-wing with plenty of folks at the office (In fact, it was that gaming community that got me sucked into xwing in the first place!)

Edited by ScummyRebel

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4 hours ago, rabid1903 said:

You do you man, you do you.

A friend of mine said exactly this to me last summer and it was just what I needed to hear to get me into my local store and try my hand at X-wing with a bunch of sweaty guys I didn't know, hovering around a series of tables pushing little plastic ships around. I thought, "Is this going to be my life?"

They were having a great time laughing and chiding each other, talking strategy, suggesting different upgrades that might work better, and just being themselves, warts and all. And yes, that IS my life, and I chose it. For those two, three hours a week it's freedom from judgement about our choices. It's commiserating about ideas and techniques. And it's a chance to test yourself and see if you have the skill to pull out a win.

It's easy to say "Don't be embarrassed," about your hobby, your taste in music--whatever. Until you are comfortable with "you doing you" that feeling is going to linger. Let your freak flag fly or keep it under wraps--do what works for you. As long as you're happy with your choices and aren't hurting anyone else, you're golden.

You do you man, you do you.

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5 hours ago, Cubanboy said:

I work at a very large company that handles 1,000,000,000 plus worth of investments and can say without question I have a Tie Fighter hanging out along with my Dir Ker Pop. You just have to be one with the force :-p

Honestly the older I get the more I don't have the energy to care what other people think about my hobbies, in fact more people are starting to like Star Wars because its trendy and board games are in a golden age. Be encourage.

Imperial uhm? A proud T 65B on my desk. Porkins. 

On the far corner of the employee's rest room and Ready to fly Red Veteran + R2 vs Academy and Obsidian. More than a year. Now one deck of London After Midnight card game. 

My friends, my family and my co workers know I am a geek. But I dare not to speak about Proton Torpedoes, Proximity Mines, Tiger Tanks or GBUs outside my Safe Spaces

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16 hours ago, ficklegreendice said:

no need to feel embarassed

at the same time, it's gonna be difficult to impart what exactly happened to people who don't actually know the game :P

To be honest, the sentence "Game night, and I won" covers most of the salient details for anyone who isn't bothered enough to try and understand the rest. A lot of listeners will probably assume poker unless you can be bothered to correct them

9 hours ago, jonnyd said:

There was a point when dating (my now wife) that she asked about all the magic cards perfectly filed in my closet.  I told her at the time she may not want to know, but I knew she was a keeper when she asked again.  She eventually learned to play, though she doesn't play now.  After having so many SO's that gave me crap for my hobbies it was nice to find one that at least took the time to understand them.  That was before I started playing x-wing but the conversation would have gone exactly the same.  

The thing is, most people - when you talk to them about it - will either react with either a polite lack of interest or curiousity. The point where it's awkward is if you either (a) try and avoid mentioning it ("are you embarrassed?") or (b) kind of shove it in someone's face (because even if they would have been politely disinterested, they're still disinterested)

As noted, most people are geeky about something, and most of the people worth spending the time to talk to ultimately know their own hobbies are just as ridiculous when you boil them down to a basic level.

I remember having a similar conversation talking to someone about squash - "locking yourself in a small box and starting a hard rubber ball ricocheting around at high speed" was the description we ended up settling on.

11 hours ago, NeverBetTheFett said:

baby steps. Once they tell you about their weekend full of changing dirty diapers and heading to their in-laws, you won't feel as bad. Plus everyone likes star wars

Agreed. It's a **** sight easier to get someone's head around it by starting with the phrase "it's star wars". It's much the same reason why Edge of the Empire is my preferred way to get someone into RPGs; it saves umpty-ump minutes of trying to explain a setting....

 

 

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17 hours ago, TheColossal said:

I know the short and simple answer is to be proud of my hobby; if people can't handle it, screw them. Really, I'm just wondering if anyone else has a similar experience? I'd love to know how all of you manage your Xwing life with your outside life.

For a while I simply described it as "like Monopoly, but way better" and left it at that. Recently, I've tried to capture the feel of the game (and others in the hobby) with mixed results, ranging from blank stares to sarcastic remarks to some with genuine interest.

Normally, the two spheres of my life are totally removed from each other, but every now and then I meet someone who's heard of, or played, a few good games, and a great discussion starts.

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Embarrassed?  Nah.  It's Star Wars.  Who doesn't like Star Wars?

I was embarrased by Warhammer, especially when Games Workshop started introducing their cringeworthy registered trademarks naming conventions.

"What the ****'s that?"

"It's a Grey Knight Dreadknight!"

"Yeah, LOL, 'Grey Knight Dreadknight',  OK, whatever LOL"

But Star Wars?  That's more like

"Hey, is that the Millennium Falcon?"

"Yeah"

"Awesome!"

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I'd have probably never thought I was embarrassed but on a training course recently I told people in the "ice breaker" that my hobby was the pub. Which is a close second to painting and playing with toy soldiers and spaceships but... I somehow felt awkward about trying to explain to a bunch of randoms what I choose to do with my time.

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18 hours ago, Slugrage said:

I'm in my mid 40s. Everyone around me - friends, coworkers, random hangers-on - they all know I'm a Star Wars geek/nerd. I have no problem admitting it. I fully admit to playing games with toy plastic space ships (and yes, that's the wording I use). As everyone else said, own it.

Likewise.  I further clarify that I competitively play with Star Wars toys.

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I usually tell people that I "played games with my friends" and if they dig deeper, I say tabletop games. So yeah, a bit embarrassed because people tend to have certain views on miniature games as children´s toys.

 

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2 hours ago, Pretty Green said:

I usually tell people that I "played games with my friends" and if they dig deeper, I say tabletop games. So yeah, a bit embarrassed because people tend to have certain views on miniature games as children´s toys.

 

Could be worse.

In germany the reputation of warhammer players is more like 40 year old virgin basement dwellers. So I guess that's the american DnD player stereotype? ;-)
So Miniature games are something you would not expect children to play, because they are to complicated and to expensive for them anyway. 

And here is X-Wing, actually great for children to play, because it is so simple to play and star wars is rated for all ages anyway. I bet that helps FFG with sales a lot. 

 

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29 minutes ago, SEApocalypse said:

Could be worse.

In germany the reputation of warhammer players is more like 40 year old virgin basement dwellers. So I guess that's the american DnD player stereotype? ;-)
So Miniature games are something you would not expect children to play, because they are to complicated and to expensive for them anyway. 

And here is X-Wing, actually great for children to play, because it is so simple to play and star wars is rated for all ages anyway. I bet that helps FFG with sales a lot. 

Speaking of owning it, that's how I used to get most people to understand what I did in my free time: "You know the main character in 40-year-old Virgin?  Yeah, I'm him, but not a virgin.  And it's not superheroes, it's Star Wars."

It honestly cleared up a lot of questions.  :lol:

Here's a great place to repost this:

 

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Wednesday I wore my Jawas carrying a disassembled Bender shirt to work. Yesterday I wore my comfy Star Wars movie tshirt. 

You stop thinking about it after a while. ..and my satellite office has a loose dress code.

One of my coworkers does metal detecting as a hobby. Another flips houses.

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About my third or fourth date with a girl, she told me she had wanted to be an artist when she was younger and enjoyed painting.  I asked her if she ever painted miniatures, she said no.  I showed her some of my Warhammer figures.  She made suggestions on how to paint them.  We had several very nice dates painting "dudes" together (her word for my miniatures).  I'd go out to play games with my friends or in her words, "The nerd herd."  

20 years later, we don't paint anymore, and I play X-Wing instead of Warhammer.  She never took up gaming, but she still calls my friends my nerd herd and wishes me luck when I go out of state for a tournament.  Been married to her since 99.  I never needed her to play, but she understands that I enjoy it.  That's really what matters.  Whether it is Yoga, or X-Wing, or romantic movies; if they are the right person, they will be okay with what you like.  If they don't, then they weren't.  

As for my co-workers, my fellow staff and students ask me how I did at out of state tournaments.  Be yourself.  No one else can be that.

 

 

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9 hours ago, Smutpedler said:

I'd have probably never thought I was embarrassed but on a training course recently I told people in the "ice breaker" that my hobby was the pub. Which is a close second to painting and playing with toy soldiers and spaceships but... I somehow felt awkward about trying to explain to a bunch of randoms what I choose to do with my time.

Having reflected on my previous post; I don't think it's anything to do with embarrassment. It's more to avoid the awkward star war monopoly conversations with people who don't know the difference. It's especially relevant with the "single serving friends" (as referred to by Fight Club) who you want to flow and gel with for a limited amount of time. Before never seeing again.

Everyone who knows me or works with me on a regular basis knows what I do and I've even sent links to twitch streams of my games to co-workers. Definitely not embarrassed.

To summarise; I think it's really the short term acquaintances I keep it from. And it's not embarrassment; I'm just aware how separate they are from my life. I'd rather remove barriers (in their perception) than add them. Not sure that makes a lot of sense as a random forum post but it makes sense to me.

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