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ASCI Blue

pouty player

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It finally happened, one of my players has decided to pout about how things are. I'm trying to dig more into this individual to find out if this is normal behavior or not. I unfortunately have a fairly diverse group of PCs in my game, a few Jedi (including a former Sith Acolyte as we're playing KOTOR era),  Medic/assassin, infiltrator, smuggler and an outlaw tech. In the beginning things were fairly fun although the Sith player asserted he wanted 3 female NPCs, each of which was for a different purpose. I figured okay, no problem we had a need for their abilities. As time went on he (PC and player) wanted in the pants of my other PCs, was turned down (by his master a Jedi PC and by the smuggler) the Jedi because while not celibate she's simply not interested in joining in that cluster of f's, the smuggler because anything outside a one night stand isn't in her interest. Yes I just said in plain terms, part of the gripe is his PC was friend zoned by 2 out of 3 female PCs. Aside this there are gripes of one of the other PCs, our medic not being interested in anything outside his genetic experiments (I have problems figuring out what to do with him too). My outlaw tech who is also a Jawa isn't interested in much outside building cool crap which later is very much used in combat situations (his Killbot is sick). His 3 NPCs in the beginning were supposed to be FR1 force sensitives as well, which even in the Sith empire would have had them as more than slaves/pilot, soldier, and sex toy.

This statement is bothersome: "<Name redacted> took samples and still managed to benefit in spite of being an asshat.  Which reminds me, I want <Name redacted> to train my Twi'lek as a nurse as well.  I would like a medic in my party." I'm trying to figure out if this is him as a party of NPCs or trying to oust our medic (which I'll reiterate I have no idea what to do with the guy).

By this point in the 5 pages (about 2.5 - 3) I start to lose interest and kinda want to run my face into a wall. Under normal circumstances this is a simple kick the single person out, he brings two of the other players with him which makes this not a viable option cause that would leave my doctor, my infiltrator (who is fairly inexperienced to RP), one of my Jedi and my personal Jedi NPC.

During one session one of my PCs took me aside and mentioned that the PC in question tends to involve sex in nearly everything he does as far as RPing goes. Sure as a side effect or reality deal sure, to turn EVERYTHING into booty calls gets old quick. The game that he ran was pretty similar in the end, the women as a side job were dressed like prostitutes for the lord of the manor and the men equally scantly clad. This was a D&D game taking place in the desert. Trying to bridge the gap to bring reality based cultural issues into this, claims that monogamy isn't that big a thing in our world currently, which as far as I know it kinda is in most first world nations.

I was joking a couple days ago about taking my ball and going home, at this point it's been promoted from option D or E to B. 

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Yeah my long version would be I'm not really comfortable involving sex related stuff in this game at all, and I feel that anybody who is acting that sort of stuff out in an RPG probably needs to live their life a little more and game a little less. All sex stuff in this game should be kept very tongue and cheek and PG-13 in my opinion. That's just a level of weird I wouldn't want to deal with, and you have my sympathies.

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Honestly sounds like there's a severe lack of maturity involved with that player. If you're uncomfortable as the GM, there's more than a good chance that someone else is as well. Either do as our piratical friend suggests and quit, or take your ball (the game and the other players) and leave and start a new game without them.

 

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Official stance: I have an issue (that of saturation, not the fact it's happening) , my gf (Jedi) has an issue (similar to mine which she brought up somewhat independently), (his wife's brother) who is the one who brought up everything going to sex to me initially also wondering why, not sure how his wife feels, nor the other two who are also a couple.  I know there has been some contention about lore related stuff, he IS good but his wife has had to yank him back to game before at least once to play. Keeping in mind I'm running my lore as my lore and I'm pretty liberal in what I allow (or so I like to think).

Given who is who I lose a minimum of three players for sure and likely the remaining two as well.

The lack of maturity isn't imo a lack of maturity as much as it's almost an addiction or obsession. This isn't boink everything that moves like a 14 y/o virgin would do, it's more planned and thought out.

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46 minutes ago, 2P51 said:

All sex stuff in this game should be kept very tongue and cheek and PG-13 in my opinion. 

I actually can't agree with that. It certainly does not suite my game taste. But I rather would play a session in the sex dungeon than in a dnd dungeon, because the first option would be at least entertaining. ;-)

Play Styles are vastly different and this is simply one of those compatibility issues. 

 

Which still gets back to talking to the guy, asking about a PG-13 round, because that is apparently the playstyle prefered by the OP. Either the guy will agree to that or the group splits up and that's about it.  No need for drama. 

Edited by SEApocalypse

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The PG-13 aspect isn't an issue. It's the frequency, when out of we'll call it 10 - 12 sessions 9 - 10 of them have involving this one dude trying to get tail from a PC it gets old quick. Moreso since my lore has the Jedi being celibate for the most part as a temporary measure post Sith sacking of Coruscant (~300 years after SWTOR). Which was stated publically when he tried to argue that Jedi have plenty of booty calls. This also includes after being turned down by said PCs in game.

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Hmm. It hard to imagine how something which should by now a running gag, becomes a problem. But apparently it is, which makes suggestions to solve it rather hard. He tries to get laid, fails, people make fun about him, stuff happens, action is going on, and in the next episode we will see this again. 

But apparently that is not what is happening, else you would not see a problem with it. 

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There's no gag with this. If this were to be one of those situations like.....crap I'm sure there's a sitcom somewhere, where the dork is always going after women well out of his league and gets crapped on for it. Sure that's funny, my Jawa for example is always joking about his ex-wives (9 iirc) and the bazillion children he's fathered..that he knows about. It's hilarious. I was pondering a session where one of them finally tracks him down and comes after him for child support or something.

If it were happening the way you describe SEA, I think it would be a non-issue. I'm starting to wonder if he's lost other players/games due to this kind of thing in the past.

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It never is funny from the dorks perspective, the thing is that guy tried to hit now for like 10 times within the group and got shot down each time. At this point the rest of the group must have starting to make fun about his useless attempts, warn female adversaries from him, question his manhood, tell him to just die when he open is mouth to them, etc 

All this little friendly mockery you get when you are acting as pathetic as his character does.  

Edited by SEApocalypse

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Guess they don't want to be rude to the player, so they spare his character. You guys are a new group constellation with the horny sith player being friends with a few players, but unknown to most of them`? Stuff like this easily gets creepy when PC and player perspectives get mixed up. Similar how conflict within the pc group can be great and super fun, while having conflict within the player group sucks really hard. Without knowing each other very well, it sometimes is hard to tell what parts are the character and what parts are the player. 

You could test the waters in this regard with making fun about all the failed attempts yourself, you could as well just talk with the whole group about it, it as well interesting that this is happening so often, while the pcs are barely reacting to it. It sounds rather out of character to just ignore the acolyth of the hard side and his floppy attempts to hit on the female pcs. Especially as ignoring clearly does not work to make him stop. And with him I mean the PC, not the player. Making the player stop is a simple ooc-talk.   

 

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What is this?  I don't even know where what how?  I'm very confused by this whole thing and am not sure what is going on.

The first thing I think should be asked is, are you and all the players friends in RL?  As in, have you known each other for a long time and gaming is just something you do or do you just meet up for gaming?  If the latter, I would be very careful and make sure that all the players, particularly the women, are okay with this player's behaviour.  They may act like its okay in front of him but it can be very uncomfortable and unsettling for people, especially if it feels like it is entering the domain of harassment.  Even if the player's actions are purely IC, if its uncomfortable for the others then boundaries need to be set up.  

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Hey, ASCI Blue.  Based on your description of the player and group interactions, the "horn dog's" behavior is disruptive to the group.  You should take action sooner rather than later.  This problem is not going to fix itself.

I think you have three options available to you.

1) Discuss this behavior with the group and see if the offending character can be retconned to be not so offensive.  Along this line you could also pull the character and convert them to an evil NPC.  (Yep, the character sounds evil), and offer the player the option to roll up another, more appropriate character.

2) Kick the player, continue the campaign.  (Yep, you might loose a substantial portion of the group.  You will probably lose more if you do nothing).

3) TPK.  Start a new campaign without the offensive player.

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It sounds like some of the other players are problems too, as the PCs each have their unique interests (like crafting or cloning) and don't want to be involved in other things.  Makes me ask:  is there an overarching plot that binds the group together?  Or is it a sandbox where everyone is fighting for attention each session?

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8 hours ago, korjik said:

Have the group as a whole discuss wether his behavoir is acceptable. If it isnt he can go away. If the group doesnt have a problem with it but you do, then it is time for you to go.

If the intention is to correct the behavior and have everyone move on, this could backfire. The horn dog may end up feeling ganged up on and go on the defensive. Even a rational person can behave irrationally when it feels like everyone around them is attacking them.

Instead, the first step is to pull the horn dog aside and be honest and open about his behavior at the table. Explain to him that the offending behavior has grown excessive to the point of being exasperating. Ask him if there's other facets to his character that he wants to explore in the game. Perhaps the character can be using sex as a means to escape a deeper and unrelated issue that you could bring into the game.

If he presses the matter, simply tell him that he was confronted by others that the character's actions are starting to grate on some of the other player's nerves. Most importantly do not name any names.

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I talked to my girlfriend and received clarification: IC he no longer does the behavior, it's OOC referring to previous attempts. Which does happen often. There are also game halting issues about the way certain races should be based off other lore (specifically elves as my gf is playing a Sephi-semi-human similar to Fey). She has her own lore for how her race is. This player tries to argue that elves are slutty and will bang anything with a pulse. From what I can find only a few groups of elves are actually like this and this isn't one of them.  

At this point he already IS on the defensive. He continually has made arguments in favor of why his PC should be able to bang whoever, whenever and has attempted to draw a PC into it (my gf's PC in fact who was also his Jedi master). There's also the complaining about other PCs, if I thought it would be worthwhile I'd post the 5 page debacle here for all to read.

At this point I'm seeing a split between talk and close the group. I had thought of an amusing third option specifically for him, in a session my GF ran for me after I had a plague for a regular session she introduced some form of Dark Jedi, not sure of rank or stature but by no means minor (he has a name). I could send a GMified female assassin after my problem player.

 

There is an overarching plot which I am slowly getting to, possibly too slowly. I may have allowed too much variance for this group which I now see is a bad thing and should have limited it to F&D rules. I introduced a character a few sessions ago who has been sending the group on significant credibility building missions. I was going to wrap up Friends Like These then bring him back in as a high level intelligence specialist in need of a diverse skill set to save his world and the PC's passed with adequate production. Upon world saving the group was going to find the extra dimensional bad guys are starting crap in our galaxy/dimension (think Freespace and the Shivans mixed with a bit of Babylon 5 Shadows) and its the group's job to amass a force that can drive them out, pacify, or destroy them.

Out of character we are friends which is what makes this a big *****. If I were to axe him specifically he takes 2 players with him and likely the remaining two would no longer be interested as one came in semi-interested the other is lacking in experience, and is likely there because the semi-interested player is her boyfriend. There's also the going to things as a group which would go out the window too. I do have a cheap way out involving my education since we game on the weekend and Saturdays are generally one of my finish homework days.

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In all honesty, from everything you're describing this guy just sounds like someone I wouldn't want to interact with game or no game. It's like someone used Sith alchemy to make the most mean spirited stereotype of the misogynist neckbeard gamer manifest. I mean generally it really ticks me off when gamers get called that kind of stuff by "culture critics", but when there is genuinely someone who acts that way, wow, I am not on their side. 

I mean, a player insisting that another players character is a **** and should sleep with his character, that's well beyond the pale of what I would tolerate at my game table, let alone social circle. 

Edited by Aetrion

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Outside of game he's really pretty cool, which again sucks cause it's only in game, and so far 2 out of 2 games he's done this and according to the brother in law does this kind of stuff at virtually every game he's in. There's a Malifaux game we all play in together too, I'm not sure if this behavior has started yet or not.  It just gets old, if I wanted porn I'll stay home.

If it wasn't five or six freakin' pages long I'd just post what he sent.

I see you made an edit Aetrion, given the number of complaints about the other PCs actually RPing their characters well, the final nail is coming quickly.

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