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Maveritchell

One Shot First, a fan-made adventure book/sourcebook, now available!

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After about a year of working on this off-and-on, I've finally wrapped up my latest project, One Shot First1, and I'm pleased to be able to share it with you guys.

 

One Shot First is a project that's been slowly gaining momentum - I started out with a series of interconnected adventures that I'd planned to release with a large gear supplement and some basic planetary information (like a more expanded version of my previous adventure, A Primal Enterprise), but when Lords of Nal Hutta dropped earlier this year, I was inspired by FFG's more avant-garde approach to species and decided to go whole-hog and make a full supplement. The final Word doc was 90MB - I don't know that I've ever seen one that size!

One Shot First is a full-length Savareen sector sourcebook all about exploration and adventure, similar to Suns of Fortune or Lords of Nal Hutta, although I've tweaked the modular encounters - they're now a set of one-shot adventures, playable as standalones, as modular adventure templates, or as a six-part campaign. One Shot First also has a full set of player options, with three new species2 and plenty of new weapons, gear, and vehicles.

I could type several more words to describe the book, but instead I'll just post it here:
http://thompsonpeters.com/eote/modules/

Check it out!

1No, there's no relation to the One Shot Podcast. It's a book about Rodians and One-Shots, what do you want?
2Yes, the Siniteen species is pretty off-the-wall. It's intentional, and check your math! Kudos if you recognize the reference.
 

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I've only had a quick look through so far, but very nice work! Thanks for making it available.

 

Thanks, and I'd love to hear any later thoughts you have too - especially those of you guys that just worked on Spark. I know you can probably empathize with the challenges of a book like this, and your unique perspective will be great to hear.

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On first glance, it looks good. I suspect that any comments I have are going to be minor nitpicks.

However, you have successfully triggered my OCD, so be prepared to receive a fair amount of those nitpicks. ;)

 

If you (or anyone) can't find something to disagree with in 142 pages of text, I think I might even be a little disappointed. :)

 

If you want to find fertile ground for disagreement, I'd suggest starting in the Player Options chapter. The species are pretty out-there, designwise, and gear stats are always ripe for fiddly little tweaks.

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Always love new stuff to catalog. And I seriously have no idea how you guys can do all this stuff to make this look similar to an official book. I can't resize a picture without messing it up.

 

Other thing: the ZH-25 Questor has an official profile, in Force and Destiny Beta.

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This turned out great!

 

Some of the fonts look fuzzy to me, but since nobody else has mentioned it, maybe I need new glasses.  In particular, the paragraph headers in red and pretty much all the text in the font colored 111,110,33 (character names, etc.)  I'm using Preview v8 on a mac.  It's not so fuzzy I can't read it, though.  

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Other thing: the ZH-25 Questor has an official profile, in Force and Destiny Beta.

 

Don't do that to me, don't do it. I already scrapped two fully deckplanned-out ships from this book because they were in some other source.

 

Sigh. I'll update the stats. I had them wrong anyway (I copied my template and never changed it, and I missed it in proofreading!). The link should now reflect the correct change. Thanks for the heads-up!

Edited by Maveritchell

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If you (or anyone) can't find something to disagree with in 142 pages of text, I think I might even be a little disappointed. :)

For SoR, I found almost as many things as there were pages — I’m talking mostly typos, grammatical errors, and other copyeditor type things.

There were a few other things I found as well.

If you want to find fertile ground for disagreement, I'd suggest starting in the Player Options chapter. The species are pretty out-there, designwise, and gear stats are always ripe for fiddly little tweaks.

I’ll get there. But I’m actually less likely to disagree with those because I have less experience on the game design/GM side of the house, as I do when it comes to fiddly things like copyediting.

One thing I can tell you off the bat is that I do like the use of the X-Wing silhouette for the page numbers, as opposed to the old and boring Millenium Falcon. This is a small touch, but I do like it.

I really do not like the shade of yellow you used on the right-hand side of page 10 and page 18. That is very jarring to me. That needs to be toned down — a lot.

I’m not wild about the outline style of the Advantage symbol you use in the pre-gen character sheets starting on page 12. IMO, that Advantage symbol should be solid black.

I do like that your setback die symbol is not pure black itself, but instead a charcoal color with a pure black edge. That’s a subtle difference, but I like it.

Your stat blocks do not have thin black outlines around the moss green/firebrick red/sky blue colors, which I think would help them stand out better against the background, and your stat blocks appear to have been done in bitmap mode instead of vector graphics mode. This was one of the things I worked really hard on for SoR, and you should hopefully see my improved stat blocks in the next “final” release.

OTOH, I do actually like your alternative layout for the pre-gen character sheets, instead of just blindly following the FFG style. I noticed that you used some different fonts, but I think your choices are very readable and well-centered with regards to the graphic backgrounds, so in this case different is not necessarily bad.

With regards to stimpacks on page 12, you can’t use them to recover strain. I don’t know where you got that idea.

On page 13, I noticed you used a white circle with black outline followed by a slash followed by a black circle, presumably because you didn’t have the proper EotE symbol font that includes the white/black split pip symbol.

I also note some differences between using an “em” dash versus a smaller dash (possibly an “en” dash) when talking about the Misdirect Control upgrades. That should be a single style that is kept consistent.

I’m assuming that the comlinks you talk about are hand-held models? You might want to call that out, since there is also a long-range comlink that they could have.

I really like the way you’ve done the yellow-on-firebrick color combination on page 19. That is very readable to me, and the strokes on the yellow font are not too thin. That was one of my issues with SoR, too.

The map on page 19 is nice, with good Aurebesh characters around the border, but I wish it was larger and had more detail. Still, it is quite nice for the size it is.

However the yellow sidebars on page 20 are seriously hurting my eyes. Especially since they have thin white stripes going across the background, which makes them even more eye-stabbingly bright. Please turn that off.

I notice that you have the same issue with the outline Triumph symbol on page 21 as you have with the outline Advantage symbol earlier. Paint this solid black, please.

Your Longspine Clan Rodian (Rival) on page 23 has a similar problem with the stat blocks as I mentioned above. However, in this case there is also an alignment problem with the numbers in the subsidiary blocks for Soak Value, W. Threshold, and M/R Defense, as well as the grey text blocks that are used for those names.

On page 24, we have more painful yellow on the right hand side, and super-painful eyestabbing yellow/white stripe background for the sidebar.

I very much like the map on page 25. Good placement of the numbers, the key table describing what number is what, the alternating colors between lines on that table, etc….

So, that’s just stuff I see off-the-top-of-my-head, as I quickly scroll through the document for the first time.

We’ve gotten to page 25, shall I proceed in this forum, or do you want to collect all this feedback somewhere else?

I did warn you about my OCD. ;)

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Too be honest, I'm not very fond of the abilities of the Sinitreens and the Nelvaanians. The Siniteens intellect equation just doesn't seem to jive with appeared with official species before (way to complicated, while the system prefers short and to the point). The Nelvaanian talent tree is really out there; and couldn't their second ability simply be Dressellian's Primitive? It would work just as well.

 

Just my two cents.

 

 

Edit: although more of a personal thing, the Pacithhip (how do you even say that?) could be silhouette 1. I'd say split the starting options - either choose legless and some penalty for more XP, or give them robotic legs. Also, most species with natural weapons have a critical rating, which they don't seem to have.

Edited by Blackbird888

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I've spent 15 min of my work time looking over this and so far it looks amazing. I do agree that the species with an equation to determine Intellect is a bad joke, but I would love if most species had their own talents.

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There were a few other things I found as well.

.

We’ve gotten to page 25, shall I proceed in this forum, or do you want to collect all this feedback somewhere else?

 

Hey, go for it! Your feedback is good - style changes are not the kind of things I act on right away, but I'm glad to hear them. A couple of the things you mentioned were obvious typos (mixed dashes, strain instead of wounds) and I've gone ahead and fixed them in the doc. Thanks!

 

Too be honest, I'm not very fond of the abilities of the Sinitreens and the Nelvaanians. The Siniteens intellect equation just doesn't seem to jive with appeared with official species before (way to complicated, while the system prefers short and to the point). The Nelvaanian talent tree is really out there; and couldn't their second ability simply be Dressellian's Primitive? It would work just as well.

 

I've spent 15 min of my work time looking over this and so far it looks amazing. I do agree that the species with an equation to determine Intellect is a bad joke, but I would love if most species had their own talents.

 

The Nelvaanian trait was originally called "Primitive" until someone let me know that such a trait already existed and was similar to what I had. It's kept different to reflect the different levels of investment required to bypass them.

 

The thoughts about the Siniteen Intellect skill are pretty on par with what I thought some reactions might be. I love it, thematically (their species hat is "math"), and it's an allusion to other portrayals of the species - like I mentioned in the first post, it's a little obscure, but if it only makes me chuckle, it's worth it.

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Lol, unleash the Brad!

 

(I've been on the receiving end Maveritchell, he's a good egg) :)

 

Gear question - the Smoke grenade, why would the user be immune to the effects? (I noticed because I had to stat a smoke grenade for my players, and it was very similar to yours).

 

Also at one point you cite a difficulty as Impossible+ (DDDDDD). I don't think this exists anywhere in any published material. Not to say you can't do it, but some may quibble. It might be better to state it as impossible (DDDDD) requiring a destiny point to attempt, but add some upgrades or setbacks that players at least have a chance to mitigate with talents etc.

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Also at one point you cite a difficulty as Impossible+ (DDDDDD). I don't think this exists anywhere in any published material.

 

Holy Smokes, you need 50 cc's of the sidebar on EotE Core pg 18 titled "Impossible Tasks"

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I like it. I won't comment on the content that I disagree with, though because last time I did the OP (of another thread) started getting very rude and somehow me pointing out his rudeness got me yelled at.

 

I will say comparing the two, this and Spark of Rebellion, I find this one more polished.

 

I enjoyed that the spacing above stat blocks on yours are useful rather than cramming them right into the text. Also I enjoy how you didn't paint 80% of your book with distracting images. When you called out a species, you listed a wookiepedia link. That is a good idea. Also your jump points within the PDF were useful to navigate around.

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Slightly off-topic, but... do you think you can go back and give Echoes of the Past the modern, spiffy treatment, plus update all of the outdated weapons, ships, lightsabers, Force powers, etc, to match the latest releases?  My group had a BLAST with that adventure; I couldn't recommend it more.  Evil Force users, dungeon puzzles, playing Jedi masters in ancient battles... lots of fun stuff.

 

In fact, my only beef with it was that you had to fight too many Ubese :)  It's still a running joke at the table that we must have decimated the Ubese population of the galaxy (my players call them "Oobies").  Maybe change up the encounters a bit.  But that's it!  Great adventure.

 

We now return to our regularly-schedule topic...

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Gear question - the Smoke grenade, why would the user be immune to the effects? (I noticed because I had to stat a smoke grenade for my players, and it was very similar to yours).

 

I started off with a weapon that did a universal effect, which makes the most narrative sense (because the smoke goes everywhere, presumably). What I wanted as an end result, though, was a tool that the player could use to escape a tight spot, and if the smoke grenade hit them too, it wouldn't really facilitate that as well. Ultimately I went with this, which I justified to myself as okay, because it's a middle ground between logical and thematic - allies still get hit if they're too close, but they can plan to get out of the way (while the only way the user could get out of the way of a blast like this would be the Strong Arm talent) - and because, presumably, the player's character wouldn't be quite so Disoriented because they were expecting things.

 

It can obviously be used to more effect than just smoke-bomb-run-away, which is fine - burning an item and a whole attack to give some Setback to enemies seems like a fair trade.

 

Also at one point you cite a difficulty as Impossible+ (DDDDDD). I don't think this exists anywhere in any published material. Not to say you can't do it, but some may quibble. It might be better to state it as impossible (DDDDD) requiring a destiny point to attempt, but add some upgrades or setbacks that players at least have a chance to mitigate with talents etc.

 

I actually had that pool one higher at one point, and the name that goes next to the pool (Hard, Daunting, Impossible, etc.) is fairly arbitrary for me (which is why I went with Impossible+). The point was not to have a logical pool that the players would immediately attempt to roll (although they certainly can try), it's to have a tool for the GM to measure the absolute effects of the players' searching efforts. Because that pool ultimately is the result of the actions players take to narrow a search area, by the time the players try to roll it, it's usually in the neighborhood of a Hard (DDD) check, and it never results in an overall fail - just a manipulation of the time taken and the degrees of success.

 

Slightly off-topic, but... do you think you can go back and give Echoes of the Past the modern, spiffy treatment, plus update all of the outdated weapons, ships, lightsabers, Force powers, etc, to match the latest releases?  My group had a BLAST with that adventure; I couldn't recommend it more.  Evil Force users, dungeon puzzles, playing Jedi masters in ancient battles... lots of fun stuff.

 

In fact, my only beef with it was that you had to fight too many Ubese :)  It's still a running joke at the table that we must have decimated the Ubese population of the galaxy (my players call them "Oobies").  Maybe change up the encounters a bit.  But that's it!  Great adventure.

 

We now return to our regularly-schedule topic...

 

Thanks! I always felt that the player-character swap with the flashback was a little clunky, but I'm glad to hear your group liked it. Designing that dungeon was a lot of fun. Going back and updating the document isn't the first thing on my to-do list, but I'll certainly put it there.

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Also at one point you cite a difficulty as Impossible+ (DDDDDD). I don't think this exists anywhere in any published material.

 

Holy Smokes, you need 50 cc's of the sidebar on EotE Core pg 18 titled "Impossible Tasks"

 

 

Count the number of 'D's I quoted there. Now have another peek at your page 18 ;)

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so what you're saying is that you somehow read my mind, found out that i wanted to play a rodian big game hunter like forever and then wrote a book to supply me with great info?

 

well played, sir. :lol:

 

Happy to oblige! Rodian was the tacit fourth species available in the Player Options section, balancing out the character foci (one smart guy, one rogue-y guy, one social guy, and one combat guy, with the Rodian being the fourth in that list). I'd love to hear how the character works out.

 

Just saw your edit, Blackbird888 -

 

 

Edit: although more of a personal thing, the Pacithhip (how do you even say that?) could be silhouette 1. I'd say split the starting options - either choose legless and some penalty for more XP, or give them robotic legs. Also, most species with natural weapons have a critical rating, which they don't seem to have.

 

I was torn over whether to offer the option of being without the prosthetic legs as a pseudo-disability (like Ammonia-breathing Gand) or not, because I could see both options as equally advantageous or disadvantageous. I left it entirely as a flavor choice for the players (i.e. choose Silhouette 0 or choose Silhouette 1 with leg prostheses). As for their tusks, their natural weapon only adds damage and a pair of weapon qualities; the base critical rating of their unarmed Brawl checks is still 5.

Edited by Maveritchell

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Also at one point you cite a difficulty as Impossible+ (DDDDDD). I don't think this exists anywhere in any published material.

 

Holy Smokes, you need 50 cc's of the sidebar on EotE Core pg 18 titled "Impossible Tasks"

 

 

Count the number of 'D's I quoted there. Now have another peek at your page 18 ;)

 

 

Ahh, good point, I was only commenting on the lack of an Impossible task!  

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Ooo! As someone who greatly enjoyed your adventure modules, this was a wonderful surprise.

I've never said it before but: thank you! You do great work, I look forward to diving into this :)

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