the scourge of X-wing

[Huhwhat 15]

There has been something I've noticed, that I can no longer keep my mouth shut about, that plagues the x-wing community.

Babies.

Everyone is spreading their seed and creating young, helpless, demanding people of the future. When will you learn that this is in the way of your barrel rolls like that big asteroid.

You think you are Dash Rendarn but you child is the pit of sarlacc. BELIEVE!

No one escapes.

Children love to pretend they care, but like Anak in the only thing they care about is themselves and ice cream. Are you an ice cream jedi?

Yoda was.

Believe me. This is a problem. Don't leave the ones you've spawned, as they are you soon to be victorious opponents, but instead get that vasectomy, or get the lady on the bc.

Behold the power of children on x-wing, look at their works, and weep.

[Moore84 38]

Anyone speak Bocce?

[TIE Pilot 3,501]

I only speak binary load lifter.

[Grave13 235]

What in the actual F@€K?!?!?!?

[General Mayhem 178]

Huh? What?

[KnightShift 306]

My brain hurts from reading that.

[Rapture 499]

This is a very bad attempt at humor.

[Sir Osis of Liver 126]

Wow. Just. Wow. Does this mean that OP got skunked by a guy who flew circles around him/her, while simultaneously juggling 3 kids under 5, and an angry wife who wanted the victor to quit the game and take care of the other 3 kids as well? Or, did he/she get spanked by a pregnant woman whose water broke at the beginning of the match, and and refused to quit until she annihilated the OP? This story has potential.

Edited December 29, 2014 by Sir Osis of Liver

[Sir Osis of Liver 126]

Wow. Just. Wow. Does this mean that OP got skunked by a guy who flew circles around him/her, while simultaneously juggling 3 kids under 5, and an angry wife who wanted the victor to quit the game and take care of the other 3 kids as well? Or, did he/she get spanked by a pregnant woman whose water broke at the beginning of the match, and and refused to quit until she annihilated the OP? This story has potential.

"My contractions are only 9 minutes apart. He's flying a generic TIE Advanced, a couple of squints without PtL, and Howlie without ST. Let me stay and kick his a$$!"

[Rapture 499]

It does not mean anything. Just a waste of space. Let it sink.

[player829067 107]

Humm I'm kinda scared in the fact I think I understood most of that.

 

Pretty much what I got is X-wing is starting to be filled up with childish babies who only care about getting what they want out of the game and want to burn the rest of us by nurfing what the rest of us use so they can win.

 

 I will say the community has become a bit more agressive of late. But I didnt think we've hit that level yet.

[Grave13 235]

There has been a substantial amount of crying lately......but its expected when every imperial toy you get looks bad ass

[WickedGrey 982]

My spawn razes city blocks¹ that defy him; devours worlds² that intrigue him; shatters dreams with his rage³.

He is a tyrant king, cruel and kind in equal measure, willful, arrogant, magnanimous, merciless. He stares into the abyss of night, and forces it to blink.

When he reads your screed⁴, he will. Not. Be. Pleased.

1 - Cities of blocks, actually.

2 - Small ones.

3 - This one is actually pretty literal.

4 - "Dad, why are you making me read some forum post written when I was a baby? This is dumb."

[sc077y 186]

There has been something I've noticed, that I can no longer keep my mouth shut about, that plagues the x-wing community.

Babies.

Everyone is spreading their seed and creating young, helpless, demanding people of the future. When will you learn that this is in the way of your barrel rolls like that big asteroid.

You think you are Dash Rendarn but you child is the pit of sarlacc. BELIEVE!

No one escapes.

Children love to pretend they care, but like Anak in the only thing they care about is themselves and ice cream. Are you an ice cream jedi?

Yoda was.

Believe me. This is a problem. Don't leave the ones you've spawned, as they are you soon to be victorious opponents, but instead get that vasectomy, or get the lady on the bc.

Behold the power of children on x-wing, look at their works, and weep.

what the hell are you on?

[FNG tie pilot 123]

You think you are Dash Rendarn but you child is the pit of sarlacc. BELIEVE!

No one escapes

Boba Fett escaped the sarlac pit....

[Marinealver 8,073]

 

Wow. Just. Wow. Does this mean that OP got skunked by a guy who flew circles around him/her, while simultaneously juggling 3 kids under 5, and an angry wife who wanted the victor to quit the game and take care of the other 3 kids as well? Or, did he/she get spanked by a pregnant woman whose water broke at the beginning of the match, and and refused to quit until she annihilated the OP? This story has potential.

"My contractions are only 9 minutes apart. He's flying a generic TIE Advanced, a couple of squints without PtL, and Howlie without ST. Let me stay and kick his a$$!"

 

Funny story but I remember playing paintball (this was well before Star Wars X-wing) and another player showed up on the field telling us he just dropped off his wife at the hospital because she is going into labor. The common joke was "So how much Alimony do you have to pay next month?"

[FFGEvan 361]

Hello X-Wing Forum Community,

 

The Off-Topic forum exists for the purpose of hosting threads such as this. In the future, please confine off-topic threads like this one to the Off-Topic forum. This thread has been moved.

 

Thanks, and keep playing,

 

FFG Forum Moderator

[Konan Nazreth 36]

I've already used this joke but it seems more appropriate here:

https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&ei=7nWhVJ7NKsesU8vBgLAL&url=http://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DsidGTHRkx9A&ved=0CB0QuAIwAA&usg=AFQjCNFxWiLgmamkktQvp8_IGUH2eBkICQ&sig2=Apb9jtMGEVFMAebs7j6B2Q

[TopHatGorilla 1,057]

Hey, if people want to grow their own food, let them.

[Robin Graves 6,054]

Underestimate not the jounglings.

Judge them by their size do you? And well you should not, for their allies are the cry of hunger and the dirty diaper, and strong allies these are.

[lorddrakko1 51]

[SirEmilCrane 290]

Alright I've narrowed it down to three possibilities

 

1. A rant about children destroying game pieces (which the little snotlings do with alarming regularity)

2. A complaint about losing players from the play group because they're having spawn

3. A plea to the x-wing community to practice safe sex, in which case I laud the OP on his social awareness

[TopHatGorilla 1,057]

Alright I've narrowed it down to three possibilities

 

1. A rant about children destroying game pieces (which the little snotlings do with alarming regularity)

2. A complaint about losing players from the play group because they're having spawn

3. A plea to the x-wing community to practice safe sex, in which case I laud the OP on his social awareness

 

It's #2.

[General Mayhem 178]

Alright I've narrowed it down to three possibilities

 

1. A rant about children destroying game pieces (which the little snotlings do with alarming regularity)

2. A complaint about losing players from the play group because they're having spawn

3. A plea to the x-wing community to practice safe sex, in which case I laud the OP on his social awareness

I'm going #3 

[Cununculus 661]

Been away on a holiday and now read this. Hilarious!

Of course the OP doesn't realise it is part of a masterplan of us parents to create an army of well trained X-wing players who will trounce his dreams of ever reaching any final, anywhere, in-the-world....

*low evil laughter*