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Your Funny Deathwatch Storys.


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#1 BrotherCaptainRJ

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Posted 17 September 2011 - 05:54 PM

So today in my Deathwatch game after a battle with a tzeentch demon prince. He vortexed are SW Lib and himself to the top of a hive cluster about 300ft in the are or so. The Following battle between him and the prince looked like the fight with the balrog in LOTOR. Are lib won the fight, and in order to get of the building that was falling jumped off, now keep in mind this is 300ft up. Then he burned a fate point in order to live. The rest of the kill team saw this as the got out of the building and was like wtf.

 

Basicly post your silly deathwatch storys to.



#2 Don Raccoon

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Posted 17 September 2011 - 07:41 PM

Burning a fate point allows you to avoid death if it's feasible. Being naked in space for example would mean death can't be avoided. So falling so far, how did he manage to survive?

Plus I wouldn't allow burning a fate point to prevent suicidal actions. Any player that did that in my game, would be dead.



#3 Gokerz

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Posted 18 September 2011 - 04:52 AM

Don Raccoon said:

Burning a fate point allows you to avoid death if it's feasible. Being naked in space for example would mean death can't be avoided. So falling so far, how did he manage to survive?

Probably the same way real life people who fell from far greater heights did.

The trick lies in not dying from the sudden deceleration.

If it's something unenhanced, real life humans are capable of, I don't require my players to give special explanations when burning fate points. Especially if it's the result of an awesome action and disallowing it would result in an uninteresting death.


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#4 H.B.M.C.

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Posted 18 September 2011 - 03:44 PM

We had an epic game on Saturday. It was just a small one-shot scenario, centred around our Kill-Team (Storm Warden Tactical, Space Wolf Tactical, Novamarine Tactical and Ultramarine Tech-Marine) infiltrating a Tau outpost on a world the Adeptus Mechanicus wanted to turn into a heavy mining operation. We had to sneak in, destroy their command post, send a message signal the uprising among the sleeper cells, and then get out again.

 

Fire Caste presence was low, but there were significant Auxiliary units present.

We started by eliminating Kroot patrols, then taking out the internal security of the base before sending the transmission while fighting off swarms of Vespid, but the funny moment came in the second-to-last part, where we had just set some explosives in the Tau manufacturing plant. A Hammerhead gunship trundled in and got ready to ruin our day.

Instantly my Storm Warden called a Thunder Strike, and being Rank 5 it wasn’t hard to spread it to those not of my Chapter. Using our Surprise round we bolted behind the Hammerhead, the Tech-Marine smashing it in the rear with his Servo-Harness. He actually immobilised it (but the GM ruled that as it was hardly moving it wasn’t instantly destroyed). It was also ruled that the length of the Railgun prevented the tank from firing at us, as we were too close for it to get a bead on us, so we spent another turn carefully planning a Meltabomb, all ready to run like hell as the explosive took it out.

At this point our Novamarine player decided that he wanted the glory of killing the Hammerhead for himself, so he charged. With his Combat Knife. To his credit, with Feat of Strength he did manage to knock off a few pips of structural integrity, but it wasn’t enough.

Having set the Meltabomb on a 10 second timer, the rest of us legged it. Our Tech-Marine copped an over-watch Railgun shot that took him to 1 wound (and that was only after Renewed Vigour kicked in), and luckily it missed my Space Wolf (I was playing 2 characters). The Novamarine though was determined to get that kill, and decided to stay. Next round came around and BOOM, the Hammerhead was reduced to smoking shards and the Novamarine was blasted to smithereens. GM let him burn fate to just make it out of the blast radius, and he used everything he could to scrounge a few wounds back.

The final section saw us fighting Commander Flame Wing on top of a Manta as it was leaving the atmosphere, and that was easily the most metal thing we’ve ever done in Deathwatch, but the headstrong and foolish Novamarine who got himself team-killed by one of my Meltabombs will always be remembered.
 

BYE


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Matt Eustace. Contributing Author Credits: Church of the Damned, The Lathe Worlds, The Lathe Worlds - The Lost Dataslate, Only War Core Rulebook, Hammer of the Emperor, Shield of Humanity, Tome of Fate, Tome of Blood, Tome of Excess and Tome of Decay.

The views expressed in this post are my own. I do not speak for or on behalf of Fantasy Flight Games.


#5 Old Man Winters

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Posted 19 September 2011 - 08:32 AM

Just started up a campaign following Final Sanction with a Space Wolf Librarian, Black Templar Tactical, Dark Angel Apothecary and finally a Dark Angel Assault marine who decided to emulate Cypher by duel-weilding pistols and ignoring his jump pack.

They all did well and made it to the Broodlord's lair mostly intact despite leaving every pdf soldier/nobel/good hearted citizen to die in the campaign. The Broodlord began to wreck them proper, throwing the Templar against a wall and almost doing the same to the Space Wolf before Assault Marine saved him. Long battle short, it came down to the Apothecary to finish the Broodlord off, everyone else all but dead from the fight. Considering he only had a bolt pistol and a chainsword with a WS of 36 (rolled badly at character creation) and the Broodlord was only about half-dead, he decided to go balls to the wall.

Taking out the bomb he recovered from the rebels attempted bridge bombing a session before, he began to use every fate point he had to grapple the Broodlord and try to attach the bomb to it's chest. After being knocked down to three wounds, the bomb was finally attached and he rolled away to the edge of lair. Just to rub it in, our player wanted to do a one-liner before he set the bomb off. I gave it to him and he used the appropriate "It's been a blast..." line before clicking the button.

While the Broodlord died in a 80s action movie type of way, it also set off the promethium tanks located in the factory, causing the entire building to go up in flames. After much discussion, we all agreed that only the Apothecary survived the explosion in the end (a reward for the quick thinking and awesome one-liner). I gave them the option of burning a fate point but they turned down, figuring they just re-roll and impressed enough to let the Apothecary earn his Sole-Survivor Badass award.

Still trying to figure out how to do the follow up with Oblivion's Edge now that he is alone...maybe another Deathwatch team shows up? At this rate the Apothecary will just blow up the Hive Ship by himself, spouting another one-liner.


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#6 BrotherCaptainRJ

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Posted 20 September 2011 - 08:47 AM

The reason are storm warden jumped that i forgot  to tell last that the building he jumped off was filled with demons and a warp gate in the sub basement. So he called is a orbital strike to take out the building. i had called a thunderhawk and tolled him to wait. There was time before the strike hit but he jumped anyway.



#7 ShadowFighter88

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Posted 20 September 2011 - 02:57 PM

BrotherCaptainRJ said:

 

The reason are storm warden jumped that i forgot  to tell last that the building he jumped off was filled with demons and a warp gate in the sub basement. So he called is a orbital strike to take out the building. i had called a thunderhawk and tolled him to wait. There was time before the strike hit but he jumped anyway.

 

 

 

Besides, you could probably fluff surviving the fall as, what I've started calling, "Pulling a Seigfried" after this scene:

www.mangafox.com/manga/history_s_strongest_disciple_kenichi/v43/c416/6.html

www.mangafox.com/manga/history_s_strongest_disciple_kenichi/v43/c416/7.html

www.mangafox.com/manga/history_s_strongest_disciple_kenichi/v43/c416/8.html

www.mangafox.com/manga/history_s_strongest_disciple_kenichi/v43/c416/9.html

www.mangafox.com/manga/history_s_strongest_disciple_kenichi/v43/c416/10.html

 

EDIT: Using densely packed objects that'll break from the force to slow you down before you finally hit a solid surface.



#8 BrotherCaptainRJ

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Posted 20 September 2011 - 05:08 PM

Basicly he did that. Or you can go with saying "the emperor protects." Just saying.



#9 Ralzar

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Posted 03 October 2011 - 11:18 PM

I'm playing a Space Wolf Devestator with a Heavy Bolter in our Deathwatch campaign. We were infiltrating an Imperial city which had been subverted and taken over by the Tau.

While working our way towards our target, we come upon a large theatre. Looking inside, we find a bunch of humans working on ways to spread the heretical ideas of the Tau. On stage, actors are practicing a musical play promoting Tau ideas with a white-robed choir behind them.

We decide to attack them and I start the assault with this memorable declaration to the other people around the table:

"I open fire on the choir."

 

Naturally, there was a massacre. My GM still holds this as one of the most memorable, and absurd, lines he's heard through his GMing career. I wasn't even trying to be funny. I'm carrying a heavy bolter, of course I'm going to open fire, and the choir was the biggest concentration of targets :D


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#10 Arguyle

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Posted 04 October 2011 - 01:26 AM

my first experice with this system was playing as a Black Templar apothecary in a kill team with a Blood Angels assault marine, a Space Wolf devistator, an Ultramarine tactical marine, and a Dark Angels liberian. We played through the mission in the back of the book, with minimal modification or understanding of the rules (lots of double attack actions and so forth). through the course of the mission we generally stomp a bloody mess out of everything insight taking like zero damage becuase we hadnt found the errata and its nerfs yet, except for our assault marine. Now the big edit to the mission was the tension building of the hordes covering the frozen earth as far as the eye could see and our assault marine at the time is at crit 1 (since we didnt know about auto sanguine/hardy i couldnt fix it). and we set to fend it off while we wait for the thunderhawk starting at the bottom of the hill we found and make a fighting retreat to the top. during this defense we kill hundreds of maginutude in horde but our assault marine loses an arm to the seething masses, their random fire brings our devistaior to criticals im running from marine to marine trying to keep us as close to above  criticals as i can when it seems that deliverance has come... actually the shadow is a winged hive tyrant that lands just out of melee range of me and screams for a bunch of damage pushing me into criticals.

this is where the awesome happens, our assault marine stays true to the protect the healer and kicks on his jet pack and shoulder tackles the tyrant and attempts to move him with an opposed test... ass marine rolls 01 tryrant 99.... thats right the one armed guy hockey checked a bus and made it move. the resulting step back from the tyrant bought the kill team enough time to foucs it down quickly (double attack actions becuase we were dumb and too exicted to play to bother with silly things like rules remember ?) , not quck enough to save the assault marine from loosing another limb, but quick enough that the masses didnt make it to us before the thunderhawk came to our rescue.



#11 l33tninj4

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Posted 04 October 2011 - 09:46 AM

I've got two stories from different campaigns.

Once we were playing all Space Wolves and our GM put us on a feral world where he describes a prehistoric landscape and even a T-rex looking monster eating a recent kill. So the three of us look at each other grin and start playing "Stone, Shear and Parchment" over how got to kill it. Our Long fang won and with his BS of 114 proceeded to just shy of liquify the thing. We all then gathered trophies from the kill: two scale hide cloaks and a tooth necklace.

 

The other time was much more recent; we were supposed to drop in a Mechanicus facility held by the Tau but our drop pod hit something and landed miles away. (I think it was a Tau Drone personally) We then kicked the throne loving snot out of Kroot then find a monorail that would get us to the hive with the facility. Our first question to our GM was as follows: "what can we use to make this thing into a bomb?" He gave us some prometheum barrels, plasma coils and we used all our grenades. He decided to spite us and have a rather scary drone fighter we dubbed a "Man o' War" but it was destoryed by a Blood Angel Assault Marine with Lightning Claws and our Salamander Librarian with psychic phenomenon. We then armed our little creation and bailed out, all of us passing our agility checks to jump out.

 

Fun times indeed.



#12 Morkalg

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Posted 04 October 2011 - 07:24 PM

The last game I ran was funny to me but not my players... every single one of them at one point or another dropped a grenade or screwed up a throw so badly that one went off near them. I think they did more damage to themselves than the opposition did. 

They fear grenades now and have vowed to not use them anymore.


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#13 Mooape

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Posted 05 October 2011 - 01:13 AM

The funny begins even before it's started: in two weeks from now I will start playing the apothecary on a team of 10-ish. The fun part being that with his FEL50, the team FEL-average grows to 37 . I'll make sure to post our, erm, progress...



#14 UncleArkie

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Posted 05 October 2011 - 04:09 AM

 So we are playing through the into scenario and our group being an argumentative bunch of know it alls pretty much argue our way through the thing, when not in combat we argue. Also no one uses cover and only luck and dice-rolls blessed by he who sits on Terra saves us from our own stupidity.

As we are making our way through the Brood Lord's lair we keep failing pretty much every roll, fall into every ambush and just go about being generally useless. Finally the BL jumps us in the main chamber, everyone fails their perception/awareness roll's except for your's truly who has been more or less expendable the whole evening other than providing a lot of good game being Iznogood (I want to lead the kill team instead of the killteam leader) and proceeds to one shot the thing with an open ended hit with a Kraken round that just kept rolling 10's doing the thing in in one hit, even hitting it in the head.

Anticlimactic to say the least, especially considering how everyone else were talking about how much ass the BBEB had kicked.

 

Of course our Librarian almost managed to set herself on fire (yes we have a girlmarine, I don't like it either), our apothecary knocked himself out, I (tactical) managed to shoot one of my brothers in the face, it was just all in all the most fail group ever.


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#15 KnightErrantJR

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Posted 08 October 2011 - 04:20 PM

 I've had a grand total of one session, but there were quite a few humorous moments.

The rest of the group has already been playing for a while, so I was accidentally awakened from a stasis pod in the middle of a daemon encounter.  The second the pod opened, the library had an . . . incident, there was a bit of a quake, and my grand introduction was to fall flat on my face in front of the daemon.

Also, the apothecary's first action in the fight against the daemon was to throw a camo tarp over it's head.  

Apparently our assault marine only ever gets hit in the right leg.  The GM even joked, when he took a hit this week that he got hit in the right leg before he looked at the dice, and the player asked "really," and it turned out he actually did, indeed get hit in the right leg, once again.

And I was merciless to our Blackshield, because when he wanted to fall back and get a better position, I asked if his chapter were the Ferrets, hiding up the invisible pant leg of destiny to hide from greatness . . . at which point he tried to prove his valor by ramming our foes with a cycle.


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#16 UncleArkie

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 03:30 AM

I'm going to completely necro this thread cus, well I just logged on after a long absence, had a like and it fit with what happened during our last game session.

 

So go give you an update. The same group has been playing on and off now for a couple of years and it's been really, really good; Our GM has been weaving a story that leads back to the time of the Heresy, lost primarchs, forbidden lore, going rogue, coming in from the cold, being thrown back out —Lots of emotional moments.

 

Personally my tac marine has been away for a while since I moved abroad and was out of the group for 18 months, but luckily the GM used that as a plot and they found out that my TacSmurf was actually an Alpha Legionnaire infiltrating the DW, needless to say he needed to die.

 

Well I just came back to the group and we kinda wanted to reintroduce my character, mind you the still haven't gotten the AL who is now something of an Arch Nemeses. Upon meeting my "real" character they obviously very suspicious and basically ice him out from the get go, but Justinian being a trooper and a team player (and not so much Iznogood as I originally portrayed him) manages to work his way into the good graces of the team.

 

Anyhoops we are all off on this planet that has recently been taken back from the Arch Enemy because the Inquisition found something that they want us to take a look at, it's all very exciting and is tied into the whole lost primarchs thing that we're running through. Anyway, the others are off doing their thing while my character — having been a scout sergeant — scouts ahead. The others end up in a nasty fire fight, pinned down and running out of options, now mind you I've been my usual unlucky self, fumbles, critical misses, bad stealth roll's you name it, I've failed at it. So trying to sneak up on an Alpha Legion strike team might not seem like the brightest moment, but meh, I do it. 

 

A few failed rolls later and I'm basically a hostage, being a veteran Ultramarine Sergeant (the meta-excuse the players use as a reason to not just abandon me to die) I need to be rescued. Mind you Justinian is mortally embarrassed by this whole ordeal and during a short exchange manages to tell the others not to come for him, needless to say they don't listen.

 

Since the first session they have however learned to use cover, grenades and traps and so on, basically they fight smart and suddenly the dice turns. My character manages to get lose, the Librarian kills their sorcerer with an epic crit that ruptures the traitor who has been alive since the great crusade like a blood melon taking 2 of his underlings with him in eldrich witch fire, the assault marine makes short work of their heavy support (a dreadnaught) and everything else just seems to work for everyone... Except for yours truly...

 

Finally confronted with the traitor that stole his identity, besmirched his reputation and generally made the groups life a living hell for 2 years I am psyched to be the one to confront him in one to one combat. I draw my power sword and charge him, having spent a ton of my exp getting elite upgrades for just this moment. Needless to say, I fail. Attack after attack miss, bounces off his artificer armour or is dodged by this cur who's head really needs to be separated from his shoulders.

 

Our GM has designed the fight flawlessly, everyone else is challenged just enough for it to feel epic when they finally win their individual mini-fights, me I just keep almost not surviving. So down to 2 wounds, my armour hacked to bits the GM has done everything he can to slow the others down a little so that I can get my moment in the sun as well the other four arrive in the hall where we are fighting. Now mind you, they hate this guy, everyone wants a piece of him. New initiative is rolled the AM charges with his jump pack, the librarian is powering up for an unfettered strike of doom and our devastator has a las cannon aimed at him, it's not or never. Traitor finally strikes my character down after another round of bad luck when the Apothecary wins the initiative, rolls a 01 on his attack and then does the open ended 10 bolt pistol death by headshot killing him off in the most nonchalant version imaginable (he also had a moment earlier where he saved the world from a left over virus bomb that had been sitting there for 10000 years). 

 

It was a LOT of fun, but I'm gonna make a new character, he's cursed.


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#17 Avdnm

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 07:10 AM

I think the most funny moment I had in my campaign was during an Tyranid invasion on a factory world.

 

When the Hive Tyrant entered the battlefield, the killteam went for an assault with an armored vehicle into the tyranid masses, supported by a fire corridor towards it from the Skitarii. Once there, the KT except the devastor left the vehicle to go for the Tyrant, he prefered to stay on the roof of the vehicle and throw his bolt rounds into the masses. As I didn't like him to stay out of the action too much(and they fought way to good against my hordes), I added a Harrdian with a horde of gargoyles attacking the devastor and their vehicle. As the harridan was approaching the devastor, who insisted on standing his ground stoic (his deamonour) it was getting closer and closer, until the harridan tried to gorge him. Instead of trying to evade, he went for the full movement inside it (successing multiple rolls for jump, evade teeth, resist acid etc.) and the next round, he gave it a full auto from the inside... imagine the faces of the rest of the KT, seeing their devastor getting swallowed by a harridan, only to return shorty after in a bloddy mess.


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#18 Adeptus-B

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 02:38 PM

I ran a mission where an Imperial freighter had been boarded by Dark Eldar slavers; the Killteam was dispatched to locate the DE's 'portable warp gate' (an actual piece of wargear from the latest Codex) and destroy it before the whole crew could be forced through to Commoragh, then sweep the ship for any remaining DEs.

 

In preparation, I drew up a fairly detailed map of the freighter- a huge pain in the butt, but I didn't see any way to run the scenario without one. I figured it would take a solid evening of gaming to search the ship, skirmishing with DEs throughout until the Killteam finally locates the gate.

 

They boarded at a random airlock, made a few completely random decisions about which direction to go- and stumbled on the warp gate ten minutes into the session! All my prep work down the drain... argh! And, naturally, the DEs guarding the gate called for back-up, thus bringing all the slavers running and eliminating the need to 'sweep the vessel'... Nearly the entire session took place in a single corridor.

 

This is what I get for sweating bullets over detailed maps...



#19 Avdnm

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Posted 19 December 2013 - 03:27 AM

This is what I get for sweating bullets over detailed maps...

 

Would you mind posting it so other could take advantage of your work? :) Because finding Spacecraft maps is also a pain in the ass...


Edited by Avdnm, 19 December 2013 - 03:28 AM.


#20 Adeptus-B

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Posted 19 December 2013 - 04:57 PM

 

This is what I get for sweating bullets over detailed maps...

 

Would you mind posting it so other could take advantage of your work? :) Because finding Spacecraft maps is also a pain in the ass...

 

I'm 'between' printers right now, so I don't have a way to scan it at the moment. Maybe Santa will remedy this situation, in which case I'll be happy to.






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